That's Blarney!
by Kari Twilight Mist
Summary: Jet, Longshot, and Smellerbee find a portal to the real world where they make it a vacation and go to Blarney Castle and kiss the Blarney Stone; but since Long rarely talks it has some interesting effects. Warning: One curse word used!


**I do not own Avatar: The Last Airbender, Blarney Castle, or the Blarney Stone**

**I'm sorry if this is offensive to anyone I just found the idea humorous and went with it. Personally I **_**love**_** Ireland and mean no disrespect so I'm sorry if you take it that way.**

**WARNING! **

**There is one partially-censored curse word at the bottom (hence the 'T' rating).**

**That's Blarney!**

Jet, Smellerbe, and Longshot were walking down the streets of Cork City, Ireland. They had discovered a portal to another strange realm and were trying to turn it into a vacation. Keyword "trying".

"I HATE THIS PLACE!" Jet yelled, startling several passers by. "I mean first we find out our clothes don't blend in so I had to give up my armor _and weapons_, then we find out our money is useless so we have to get temp jobs since they are better at catching thieves here with the weird things called 'surveillance cameras'" he added air quotes there "not to mention these people all talk funny and half of the time I have no idea what they are saying!" **(I'm sorry if this offends anyone I actually LIKE the accent I'm just having Jet say this because it seems… **_**Jet**_** to me)**

"Jet!" Smellerbee scolded. "Stop being so rude you big jerk. People can hear you, you know." She paused then said "Maybe all we need is to go to a tourist attraction! Then our vacation will _actually_ be a vacation!" Longshot nodded in agreement.

Jet sighed and gave in. "Fine let's find a shop to buy a guide scro- I mean 'book'" he once again added air quotes.

"Look there's one" Smellerbee said pointing to a small shop with guide books on display in the window. "Remember, haggling doesn't work here."

"Another reason to hate this realm" Jet muttered under his breath as he followed Bee and Long inside.

"Well hello there la-" the shopkeeper began and Jet knew he was going to say "lad" thinking Bee was a boy so he jerked his head to the side sharply to catch the shopkeeper's attention and pantomimed cupping breasts as if he had them "-ssie what can I do for you today?" the shopkeeper finished with a grateful look at Jet.

Meanwhile Smellerbbe was checking the prices of guidebooks and had missed the whole interaction, thankfully, while Longshot stood beside her checking as well. "We need a book that has information on nearby tourist attractions please."

"Well this one is just the one for you then" the shopkeeper said pointing to one of the books "it has_ tons _of information on the Blarney Stone at the Blarney Castle."

"What's that?" Jet asked.

"It's a stone they hold you upside down to kiss and it gives you the gift of gab."

"You kiss a stone upside down? That sounds crazy!" Bee said.

"Crazy awesome! Let's do it!" Jet said excitedly earning a_ look_ from the other two gang members "Come on this has to be the weirdest thing we've ever done and last time the bar was set pretty high so I think it would be sweet to break that record!"

Longshot groaned at the memory of them having a contest to see who could suck the most frogs unfrozen in one candle mark. Jet won followed by Bee then Long.

"We'll take the book" Jet told the shopkeeper and they purchased it with these so-called "euros".

A couple tour busses later they were at the Blarney Castle "up to the top we go!" Jet said leading the way.

Once they got there Smellerbee said tentatively "uh… Jet? That guy looks like he's about to fall off the roof."

"Well the book said it was a bit risky but we've been living in the_ trees_ for _years_. It shouldn't be a problem."

"Okay but you go first."

Jet went up to a man who helped him lean over a rampart and kiss the stone upside down.

"C'mon Bee you're next!" Smellerbee followed in his footsteps then Long did.

As soon as Long was upright Jet and Bee noticed his pupils looked dilated then: "Jet I've always hated your eyebrows. Smellerbee you are the most beautiful woman I've ever met. Jet you remember when you couldn't find your lucky socks for a month and when you did find them they were buried in the dirt with holes? That wasn't the Fire Nation that was Pipsqueak giving The Duke a sock puppet show. I hate that cheese you insist tastes delicious Jet but I've never complained. Does my nose look weird? People always stare at it-"

Jet turned to the man who held them an asked "what exactly does 'Gift of Gab' mean?"

The man was trying -and failing- to hold back his laughter as he said "It means the gift of talking a lot."

Bee and Jet looked at each other and said "OH S**T!" Meanwhile Long was still talking.


End file.
